Perception is reality - Perception 1

Connecting.  It's the reason that social media and online professional networking have become so insanely popular.  We all want to connect with other people, and that need and desire so quickly and easily becomes a way to market, a way to get our brand out there, a way to reach people and gain new prospects.  But none of that is true connection, or is it?  It can certainly lead to that.  If it's genuine, and comes from a place of trust.  

For anyone who is using social media to market themselves or their brands (including me), I believe we need to remain cautious, both in how we present ourselves and in how we receive the information we see.  It should not be any different than how we present ourselves in public - in fact, we should probably be even more cautious online.  In the online world, people see what we show them, but they then interpret what we show them through their own experience, filters, judgments and learning.  The biggest thing that is missing online is CONTEXT.  We only see what someone shows us, and they only see what we show them.  No one has the context.

What do you see in the photo below?  Is it a pink and purple wall with multi-coloured background seen through cutouts?  Or a pink and purple wall with reflective bars hanging down reflecting what is behind you?  Two totally different perspectives, and because you don't have the context, or the whole picture (what is going around around this photo), it's difficult to tell which of these it is - or perhaps something completely different!  The same thing can happen with people - including you and me.


Imagine "Sally" has had a really bad, very busy and stressful day.  She has been running from meeting to meeting, dealing with nasty clients, didn't get lunch, it's 30 C outside and the A/C inside isn't keeping up.  The school has called to say her son has misbehaved and she needs to go in for a meeting with the teacher.  The bank calls to say there was a fraudulent charge on her credit card.  At the end of the day, she gets out to her car, and finds that it has been hit in the parking lot by a careless driver.  This is the last straw! She starts swearing to herself, upset even angry, kicks a tire, finally takes a selfie that shows the damaged car in the background and shares it on social media.  

In her anger, she doesn't bother to correct autocorrect errors (IKR?), uses a couple of words she doesn't normally, and hasn't bothered to check her appearance and looks like she just crawled out of bed.  A new "friend" sees this online.  "Friend" (we'll call him "Joe") believes that Sally is an angry person who lets something as simple as a dent in her car, which is easily fixable, is a big deal, and that she is lazy about typing her posts.   Joe comes away with a somewhat negative impression of her, which stays with him until the next time she posts something, which may be days later.  There is no point in interacting, "liking", or otherwise engaging in such a negative post!

Another new friend, "John", is walking near by to his own car, sees Sally being angry and upset, and walks over to see if there is any way he can help.  She shows him the dent and he comments that it doesn't seem too bad, insurance should cover it and she can at least still drive it.  She agrees, calms down a bit, and explains that there were several things that went wrong during the day.  She realizes that her hair is probably a mess, and smooths it almost without thinking, apologizes to John for seeming to be negative and they laugh a bit about how life hands you lemons sometimes, you just have to figure out how to make lemonade.  They go their separate ways, and John decides that Sally is a pretty cool lady.

John got the context.  Joe didn't, or perhaps got a different one.  Sally showed the same thing to both people.  John's perception is different than Joe's perception, and yet for each, it is their reality.  

How do you come across in social media?  Are you consciously aware of what your impact will be with every post or comment?  Is it really how you want people to see you?   Is it different than what you may show someone in real life?  

Just something to think about, that's all.